It's been a rollercoaster for the past 24 hours and I am hoping to get off of it soon before it completely wipes me out.
I don't even know where to begin. I had a disgusting run-in with my boys' father yesterday. I can't even begin to discuss the subject but let's just say that he continues to shock me with his narcissistic attitude. He doesn't usually shock Greg but even yesterday he shocked Greg.
After the run-in we went to church. Just what I needed to put me in the right frame of mind with God. Though church does have a way of bringing me back to center when things are going tough I have to say that it was a tough one yesterday.
Needless to say I was not in a good frame of mind at all in the afternoon or evening. I muddled through. Naturally I had a lousy sleep and couldn't concentrate for anything. I often ask myself why I let some people get the better of me. I guess my answer would be that in my life I have no choice but to deal with this person as he is the father of my boys and I must deal with him on a regular basis. We don't see eye to eye on anything and he is an egocentric narcissist. That tends to get overwhelming for me. Oh well.
I wake up this morning feeling somewhat better than the night before. Today is the first day of school and I am trying not to let yesterday get to me today. I pray before I get out of bed. I am hoping that helps. The daily grind is officially staring at 6:30 am. Boys are out of bed and Kevin is busy running around nervously getting dressed for his new high school. The others are doing the same.
It's a bittersweet morning for me. My boys are growing and I am seeing a new first today. Kevin's first high school all dressed up in tie and belt. No more down to the knees shorts with rumpled shirt. Ryan packs himself off to middle school without his brother beside him for the first time. Kelly is in a new pre-K class with lots of rules and loads of learning and homework. Jack goes to a new class with a huge plastic Fisher Price treehouse. How cool is that?
We get through breakfast and get out the door. I have to get Kevin to his new school early because we need to get him his lock for his locker and I have to help him carry all 6 textbooks to the locker. I think he would just rather I evaporate. Greg reminded me that while he thinks I am hip, cute, and cool, my kids are a different story and I am still MOM (the old geezer who doesn't know a thing about life). Alrighty then.
He goes off to meet his friends and I look back at him for just a few minutes. Enough gushing. I get Ryan off to school and luckily he hasn't reached the I-will-never-again-be-caught-in-public-giving-my-uncool-mom-a-kiss stage yet so before he gets out of the car he gives me a huge kiss and hug. I needed that badly.
In the meantime Greg was off with the little ones getting them to their preschool. I had a little time leftover so I ran up to the preschool and peeked into their classes to see how they were doing. Contented as usual.
Everyone is settled and I am off to work. I feel like I need a vacation already.